Sometimes there's a candle that comes along and changes the way I look at wax-fueled flames forever. And this is one -- The Hotwicks Stripper Candle. The $9 candle smells like strippers.

It's a candle and an alibi all in one! You don't smell like a stripper, you just smell like a candle. This is our favorite candle. After hundreds of hours of research and a lot of dollar bills we succeeded in capturing the legendary stripper scent. If you don't know what a stripper smells like just imagine the perfume counter at your local department store times a thousand... then add some glitter. This is a perfect gift for your favorite bachelor, groomsmen, or retired stripper who misses her pole.

OMGWTFNOMORESLEEPINGINTHEDOGHOUSEFORTHEGEEKOLOGIEWRITER! Wow, I really need to shake the hands of the humanitarians that spent those countless hours researching this breakthrough in scent technology. Good people. Now when I come home and the wife accuses me of stripclubbing, I'll insist it's just the candle. But if she asks why I have a pastie stuck to my forehead I'll have to run and hide in the bathroom. Another picture of the candle after the jump.